It seems there are a LOT of people out there from across the political divide that are literally choking on the fact that President Obama may have solved the Syrian situation without blowing anything up. We all know choking is bad, and is something to be either avoided or relieved whenever possible. Therefore, in the interests of all those whose hatred for President Obama trumps all else, I offer the following advice:
Wash it down with this:
STFU over ice will help wash away the bile brought about by the fact that once again, President Obama got it right and all his critics, including but not limited to:
- Baggers of both varieties (tea- and fire-)
- FerengiMedia™ drones
- Legions of foreign-policy “experts” who apparently never actually negotiated anything in their lives , and
- The ODS-afflicted in general
WERE. WRONG. AGAIN.
WARNINGS: 1. STFU over ice may induce a shock to the system if the user is forced to face the fact that this president IS actually competent, IS actually following the law, IS actually NOT as bad as Boooooosh, and IS actually smarter than the Village idiots. (OK, I’ll concede that most potted plants also meet that last criteria, but after all the teleprompter and “he didn’t EARN those grades” jackassery, I’m running with it anyway. DEAL WITH IT.) 2. Prolonged use of STFU over ice may result in:
- The return of memories of how the three branches of government are supposed to work,
- The loss of reflexive adherence to whatever bullshit talking point the American Khmer Rouge and the Nice Polite Republicans agree on on any given day (otherwise known as “ALL of them, Katie!”)
So, for all you “patriots” who think the president is simultaneously a Marxist, Communist, Islamofascist, Mau Mau, evil genius strong-arm dictator who is too weak and stupid to be president – HAVE SOME.
Dudebros who were against intervention in Syria, but are all apoplectic because the president has perhaps found a way to avoid just that – HAVE SOME.
Villagers in a funk because they can’t get their war coverage (complete with eye-popping graphics and one epic score) on – HAVE SOME.
MIC types mourning your lost stock gains because we’re trying NOT to blow something up for once – HAVE SOME.
Chickenhawk sumbitches who NEVER saw a conflict they wouldn’t send someone ELSE’S kids to go fight in – HAVE SOME.
Progressive “allies” (including those in the So-Called Liberal Media) who’ve spent this year just like they’ve spent the last four – whining about a man who has accomplished more for the Democratic cause than his last two Democratic predecessors COMBINED, and has been the only thing standing between us and the complete undiluted fascism of what now passes for a conservative party in this country – HAVE SOME.
And of course, to the Faux brigade, their acolytes, and the Faux-lites – FUCK YOU – HAVE SOME.
(h/t different church-lady for inspiring both the image and the post)